Facing the Fear

So when I was about 16 or 17, I went to a local county fair with a friend.  We rode rides, as most teenagers do, and had a good time.  Until we went to ride one more.  It was a ride with a chest harness that had to come over the head and fasten between the legs.  And I didn’t fit.  It wouldn’t close.  

And I haven’t ridden a ride since then.

I was so embarrassed that I was too big for the ride (and at that time, I really wasn’t as big as I thought I was!), and I have been afraid to not fit ever since.  I will ride the occasional ride at the fair that doesn’t require a restraint, but I did not want to face the embarrassment of not fitting ever again.

Before surgery, Eddie and I made a post-WLS bucket list of sorts.  And at the top of the list was to go to a theme park.  We live about 3.5 hours from Six Flags Great America, so that was the goal.  Eddie has most certainly lost enough weight to for sure ride on the rides with no problem.  But I anticipated that I would wait a little longer, until I had lost more weight before I would go.

But we have decided to celebrate our 4th anniversary by going to Great America this weekend!  I am terrified that I still won’t fit, but I’m told that most of the rides have sample seats at the entrance of the ride so that you can sit in it and be sure you will be comfortable.  I hope that is the case.  I feel super anxious about it, but I don’t want to miss out on a really good time just due to anxiety and fear.  I missed out on a lot because of my weight, and I’ll be damned if I’m still going to miss out because of insecurities.  

Maybe there will be some rides that I don’t fit on, but that’s OK, there will also be ones that I can fit on and enjoy (and heck, there’s a water park there too… if nothing else I can lounge in the pool!).  Just gotta face that fear and see what happens!

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One thought on “Facing the Fear

  1. Hi there….the whole doesn’t fit in something. BUT I understand being mortified. Your fears are real and you’ll manage them head on. You’re braver than you think. Go for it. Leave your old fears behind…..RIDE! HAVE FUN TOO!

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