Long time no see!

I haven’t blogged in quite some time, so I have a few minutes and am going to try to do a quick catch-up.

Eddie and I both celebrated one year post op since the beginning of the year.  He celebrated his in February, and I celebrated mine in April.  It’s hard to believe a year has gone by already since our surgeries.  We both agree that we would definitely make the same decision if we had to do it all over again.  It has definitely been worth it.  Eddie has been at his goal weight (and then some) since September 2013, and has even lost a little since then.  He’s been working to stabilize at a weight that is comfortable to him, which has ranged anywhere from 160-180.

Since the first of the year I personally have been struggling to maintain my focus.  Right after the first of the year, my Poppy was diagnosed with terminal cancer, and passed away about a month after receiving that diagnosis.  That whirlwind was really tough to deal with at the time, and continues to be difficult to deal with daily as I try to tie up loose ends regarding my parents’ estate.  Thankfully they left me with not many ends to tie up, but of course there are some, as that goes with the territory of someone passing away.  Since about the first of the year I would say that I “relapsed” when it came to using food to cope.  I didn’t completely go back to my “old ways”, but I really struggled to maintain my daily routine with food, exercise, and just my whole health in general.  I let my gym membership lapse without renewing, eating out became more frequent and grocery shopping less frequent, and mentally I felt sad a lot of the time.  Add to that two vacations, where people typically splurge, and I was really struggling.  I was dreading going to my one-year appointment with the dietitian and surgeon because I felt embarrassed that I had not made more progress.  In fact, in all honesty, I had gained about 20 pounds back since the first of the year.

Meeting with the dietitian and being open with her was actually helpful to me.  We made a plan for me to get back on track, and I am going to re-apply for my gym membership by the end of the week (which is today!), as well as start attending my weekly Zumba classes again locally.  In addition, I am getting back to recording my food with myfitnesspal.  Even if it’s not a “good” food day, I need to record it and stay accountable.  Thankfully, she is going to email with me about once a week to check in on me, which is so lovely of her to do, and is above and beyond what she would have to do in her job.

I recently purchased a necklace that says “Find joy in the journey” and I feel like I really need to remember that.  It’s not about getting to the end result, but it’s about enjoying the process of getting there as well.  Doing things I’ve never been able to do before, enjoying life as a healthier version of myself, and just enjoying the journey, wherever that may take me.

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